Second Date
A Night of Many Firsts!
The week was full of extremely confusing emotional peaks and valleys for me. College classes seemed to drone on and I was so pre-occupied with the events of the weekend that my ability to concentrate was quite poor. I couldn't understand why I had been so naive with John. I felt so incredibly "stupid" for not be able to figure out that dressing so provocatively and as as a pretty "sexy" girl had "consequences" far beyond what I had ever dreamed or comprehended. I had not even fathomed the cause and effect of the reality of what led up to the "event"- I recalled standing in front of John dressed like a Frederick's of Holleywood Catalogue model - even as I was doing it I had no idea it woud lead to sex! I could not believe how I allowed myself to submit to his advances. It was a lot like the time we first danced together when I had felt that sense of feminine "comfort" and I fell into his arms in that slow dance that changed me in so subtle a way. The dance that had seemed natural yet erotic - only this time it was far more than a "feeling". I had been "loved" as a woman, and I was fighting an "internal" battle with myself. On this date - it would be just a date. A movie was the plan and a movie I vowed to myself it would be!
About an hour before John arrived I was completely ready. I had painstakingly made myself up - looking like an all american "girl" with my long blonde hair and my very red lipstick. My white dress and white heels were a stunning combination. The dress was short and frilly, with spaghetti straps and a very low cut top exposing my "enhanced" cleavage. In the last couple of weeks I had been unconciously dieting and my waist had slimmed even further - to almost 27 inches. I often wore a waist clincher during the week under my male clothes - shaping my body into a more spectacularly feline appearance. My head to toe shape and body were stunning - especially in a dress like this. As I gazed at myself in the mirror - I suddenly began to realize that the sexy stunning girl reflected had been years in the making. I had been going out in public (mostly Jaques, the infamous night club) for almost a year. I was known as the sexy untouchable "prude" - who was a true tease and a rejector of men. The girl in the mirror had now been "touched" and the words of the many men that I had met and even rejected began to echo in my mind.
I remember on my first "failed" venture in public when the pervert who had bought me my first drink had complimented my "fuck me heels". Other men had said such awful things like "I'd love to fuck that sexy ass!" and "I'd love those sexy lips around my cock!" I'd even reacted to those statements with a slap to the face in one case - yet as I stared at "my fuck me heels" - I was now understanding why John had seen me as a "lover".
It also was beginning to make sense as to why I wore these heels and these very overtly sexy outfits. I enjoyed "being" a woman - perhaps I always wanted to be "treated" like one too! In the carnal sense I had been a man's "woman" for the first time on our first date - and was rapidly realizing that I truly must have WANTED that to happen to me. I didn't object to his advance and I had placed myself in front of a man in a skimpy "sex outfit" and in "fuck me heels!" How could a "college" boy-girl" be so stupid. How could I have been THAT naive? I must have sub-conciously wanted all of this to happen...
I wanted to learn more! When John had orgasmed with his cock so deeply embedded in my sexy derierre I too orgasmed like I never had orgasmed in my life. If I was "raped" or if it was against my will - why was it so intensely sensual and so powerfully "insipring"? A mutual orgasm is the product of mutual love making. Why didn't I object? Why was it that I had never felt more feline and never more satiated - yet I couldn't admit that to myself? Now my "female" ego and self was more than in a state of curiousity. I wanted to further experience that sexual side of femininity that I had allowed to happen to me. Was it why I dressed as a woman? Was dressing provocatively intended simply to lure a man to me? Did I want to be fucked like a woman and treated sexually as a female? The answer suddenly (to all these questions) seemed to me to be obvious......I couldn't help but wonder why none of this had dawned on me. Denial is a very powerful psychological protection mechanism!
"The power" that I had being dressed so provocatively the week before had lead to my first sexual experience. In a half hour John would be at my door and I had a simple plan. I didn't want to go to the Movies - In fact I thought perhaps I'd make a movie! Off came my sexy white dress and on came the sexy lacy red waist cinching bustierre that I had "escaped" in under my coat last Saturday. It must have been quite the panic scene as clothes in hand - I fled to John's car. he had such patience - Now my curiousity and interest was at a peak. I hid my "borrowed" movie camera under some clothes n the top of a bureau in my bedroom with just the lens exposed as I turned it on. I checked myself again in the mirror and I was so pleased that my own masculinity was hard as a rock! Tucking it down between my legs hurt!
When John arrived I opened the door in the same searingly sensual "sex" outfit in which I had been deflowered in the week before. There were no panties as my intensions wer clear! John's first gaze was of wide eyed surprise! He stared at my cute pubic heart as he looked me over from head to toe. He didn't expect my overt and clearly seductive actions. With one hand on my hip and my little finger seductively at the edge of my mouth - I found myself suddenly quite proud of my naughtiness and seductive ways. John was clearly VERY PLEASED! His smile said it all and the roses in his hand were soon thrown onto the couch as we embraced in a wondrous, sensual, tounge searching kiss! If my intensions weren't clear enough, I found myself going to my knees in front of him. "The pretty girl" was about to become a "real" pleaser and a "true" female lover!
He had been the one so patient. Months of "courting me" and my finally getting me to agree to my first date. He had always so adored me and I never forgot the feeling of being in his arms the first time we danced. He always seemed to make me FEEL so FEMALE. From holding hands on walks back from the club to my car to the soft sensual kiss he would give me upon our parting had finally brought out my feelings for him. He always made me feel so special, so pretty, and so loved. I had never really returned the favor to him. It just seemed like it was time! Pulling his huge cock from his pants seemed to please him to no end. I was stunned and it was so huge. It was beautiful, long, and like the phallus of a God. I found myself kissing it while looking up at my lover. I licked it and it didn't seem objectionable at all. John was moaning and his eyes closed as I began my first attempt at doing something that I had never even considered doing before this moment! My actions were an impulse that seemed to make sense for some reason!
